Pondering Prince Charming

All these discussions of men and dating led a friend to ask me about my notion of Prince Charming. She wondered if I think that way. And I do, in a sense. But boy have my thoughts on it changed over time! When I was younger—a teenager, in college, even recently graduated—I imagined "the guy for me" being someone with all these various traits that seemed important to me then. He would be into nature; he would be into poetry; he would have dark hair and tower over me and he'd occasionally crack a cheshire cat grin at me; he would be an extroverted introvert like I am; he would like to talk and to be together silently; he would be an explorer, have a sense of wonder--his inner child would be alive at all times. The list went on and on.

By my late twenties, I clued in a bit, realized that I could fall for guys who lacked half my requirements and find little zing flying between me and someone who fit me to a T on paper. I did take note of certain things that always mattered: if not a love of poetry, at least an appreciation of creativity; if not an extroversion, at least an ability to listen well and communicate about the things that matter; if not a deep-seated sense of whimsy, at least, for the love of god, the ability to laugh, and laugh often, and most importantly, to laugh at himself. Over time I fine-tuned Prince Charming, realizing that in most cases the things that make him right for me and not you are broad things, not specific predilections or inherent ways.

But as I settle into me thirties, I have to admit, my image of him has broadened beyond expectation. For at this point, I have days when all I really require is a backbone; a passion; an unshaken ability to pursue a woman whether he is sure he is interested or not. That is to say, following up on my previous post, it is possible that at this point in life ALL that makes a frog into Prince Charming for me is his stepping up, stepping forward, and exploring ME, whether or not he knows right away that I'm one heck of a catch.