metablognition

In class, I recently learned about metacognition—the monitoring of your own understanding and mastery of something. It put in my mind the concept of metablognition. Until yesterday, it had been so long since I'd written a blog post that I felt almost paralyzed when I'd try to think one up. I started this blog, after all, as writing exercise; but when you let your muscles go, when you fail to pick up your feet and move, your body reaches a point of inertia; and so it goes with the blogging part of my brain. I'm self-concious about it, feeling ill-equipped to say anything of interest, so I avoid being here. But I miss it, this place where my thoughts get to run around like little people climbing jungle gyms and feeling great satisfaction when they reach the top. I miss it, because I love it, so I've been telling myself to get my act together and get back here.

The post I wrote yesterday seemed very academic; even to me it seemed boring. But I made myself share it; I told myself (metablognitioning away) that I had to just put some words on the blank screen, not worrying whether they rang eloquent or not; just get the fingers typing; get some kind of thoughts flowing. The meaning and the artistry, I told myself, they'll come back.

It's like sex, I told myself; like when you haven't had sex in so long, and when you think you might again, you get nervous, wondering if you've lost your mojo. Metablognition has had me questioning my mojo; but I sat down and wrote something yesterday, and I posted it; and I'm sitting here writing now, and I'm gonna post it. So I know. Eventually, I know, I'll post something metablogmindblowing. In the meantime, god help us, I'll try not to bore you too much. :)